It's happening so fast...

PRESENT.
-what's in your cd player: katy rose
- what kind of socks are you wearing: none..
-what's under your bed: shoe boxes

.FUTURE.
-what is your career going to be: psychologist
-where are you going to live: hmm... I dunno yet
-how many kids do you want: 0 or 1
-what kind of car will you drive: mustang

.CURRENT.
-current hair: down and kinda wavy
-current clothes: black dance pants and a pink tank top
-current jewelry: 3 rings and a "M" necklace
-current smell: nothing

-current longing:to loose weight
-current desktop picture: Tons of pics of Mary-Kate olsen adn quotes around them
-current favorite music artist: paula abdul, katy rose, 3 doors down, linkin park, teh beatles, & lynyrd skynrd
-current book: the best little girl in teh world
-current worry:not binging today. Today is pizza night :(
-current hate:my body
-story behind your username: i dunno i jsut liked it
-current favorite article of clothing: my dance pants! always wearing then!
-favorite physical feature on a boy/girl: eyes

one person you wish was here right now: ex b/f. wow he helps so much!
-line from the last thing you wrote to someone: Kinda kinky are we?(lol to my ex b/f)
-i am happiest when: i'm dancing
-i feel lonely when: all the time
-do you think too much: yes
-famous person you have met:no one lol
-do you have any regrets: yes
-sex or love: hmmm... love
-favorite coffee: all of it!
-what makes you mad: lmao red necks! I hate country people
-favorite way to waste time: sleep,computer,dance
-what is your best quality: im understanding
-any bad habits: uhhh.. i twitch my nose sometimes and i contstnly shake my leg(its an anxiety thing)
-do you find it hard to trust people: yes...
-last thing you bought yourself: coffee
-bath or shower: bath
-favorite season: winter/fall/sunner hell i like all of them
-favorite color: black/purple/pink/silver
-favorite time of day: nightime
-gold or silver: white gold
-any secret crushes: nope..well its not really a crush or a secret he knows lol

.FASHION.
-how many coats and jackets do you own: 2 one tan and 1 leather but i own alot of little ones
-do you wear a watch: sometimes my grandma gave me one and only when shes around
-favorite pants color: black or jean
-most expensive item of clothing: hmmm... i dunno i think my leather jacket

.LAST.
-last movie you saw: without a paddle
-last movie you saw on the big screen: uhh... i dont remember
-last show you watched on tv: uhhh... smoething on the food netwrok
-last song you heard: my recital song "conga" by gloria estefan * our tap dance song some big business men
-last thing you had to drink: diet coke
-last thing you ate: lol wow ummm... i think soup
-last time you showered: this morning
-last time you smiled: forever ago!
-last person you hugged: hmm... my ex b/f(alex)
-last person you talked to on the phone: matt(a friend)

.DO YOU.
-smoke: sometimes
-do drugs: no
-drink: not often
-sleep with stuffed animals: no
-have a dream that keeps coming back: yes
-play an instrument: no
-read the newspaper: the daily break sometimes
-consider yourself tolerant: yes

-like the taste of alcohol: depends on what it is.. the fruity ones are the best
-believe in astrology: yes
-believe in magic: no
-go to church: no
-have any secrets: yes
-have any pets: 1 cat/1 dog/2 lizards
-go or plan to attend college: yes
-talk to strangers: yep especially the bums
have any piercings: yes
-have any tattoos: not yet
-like your handwriting: no
-have a second family: no not at all

Well heres whats been going on.
Monday It was my moms birthday. I did good until I got home and she had cake so I ate a piece then we went out to eat and I ate. :(
Tuesday I fasted all day and did good. Came home and went to dance then came home and danced for about an hour.
Wednesday I stayed home from school and told my mom I was "sick". I had an appointment with my therpaist. Remember People my mom knows I USE to have an ED and cut. SHe thinks I have stopped. So she confronts me and says "Malissa you have been grouchy lately, are you starving yourself" I told her no. She we went to teh dr's and of course she crought that up. GRRRRRRRRRRRRr. She said it was ok if i wanted to loose weight but I needed to do it the right way, and if she wanted she could get me a nurtionist. I said no. So t throw her off when I got home, I told her to make my favorite food...pesto.So I ate a bowl of that. Then I really got sick and threw up. Today I did ok. I had 1 bowl of soup(60cals) and some diet juice. Since Monday Ive lost about 5pnds. And tonight I have dance! YAY!!!!!! My collar bones and hip bones are starting to poke out more. But my tummy is swollen.:(So thats it. Buh~bye!

Well... I had to get a new name. Mostly because I wanted a journal were I could talk about my Anorexia and I couldnt on my other journal because of people at my school. Thursday I did good. About passed out at dance though. Yesterday I did so good until night time when I went ice skating with my cousin...I binged :( Oh sad sad sad. Today I did horrible also. So starting this week I am going on a MAJOR fast. Anyone wanna join? Well Im gonna go. Pce out hoes!!